Where my head is lately.

  I give so much...

I do so much....

I help people because I am a genuinely good person. I am a point for resources and mental ability. I have lived in struggle mode my entire life. I know the value of a dollar. I know the value of people.

I respect people for themselves. I don't judge by race, sex, religion, or hell even sexuality or anything of that nature.

I believe all people are genuinely good or start that way.

I have 2 rules.

Do NOT lie to me. Tell me things even if I don't like them. 

Do not take advantage of me.

I feel like people appreciate what I bring to the table but when I am in need, its oh that sucks, wow that is bad...hope it gets better.

People need food, I help either with resources or I bring it.

Car is down...if i can help I do. Ill do the work if I can. I don't charge. I just want to keep people rolling.

I have had a rough past. Because of it, I have many different values that some people might not get unless you have been in my shoes.

I tend to be used a lot. I can let things go most times, But I have finally reached my breaking point.

Someone I care deeply about, has broken my trust. And I cannot deal with that. I don't do secrets and bs. If I have been open with you about shit I don't openly talk about to others, I expect that they should be able to know that I will listen and advise if they want it. I cannot make these choices for them but I will give an opinion, or help weight possibilities.

I am a pretty open person. But, I am hurt. Deeply. Anyone needs anything they call me first because I usually have the answer and if not I can find the correct answer. But I am tired of being an afterthought.

If I ask for something simple. Time...or if something I cannot do because of my health to be done and get told yeah np. But later...its Oops, I forgot, got distracted. OR Ill do it later. But yet you know you can ask me and I do whatever I can in my power...

Why is this the case? Why do I shoulder everything?

This comes from friends, and family...and others that I consider family even that aren't my blood and I don't care because sometimes chosen family is better then blood.

I have so many things going on. So much on my plate.

I literally and tired. I am tired of chronic illness and being told how I look fine.

I battle for my kids, my family. I get called in a pinch to do whatever needs to be done.

I have set boundaries that I feel are fair based on what I have experienced in my life.

This isn't research it is a pattern of behavior. And I am so tired of it.

I work non stop. I am sick. I need a hand and get ignored and so depend on me.

Where is MY support system?

I do not care about money and stuff as long as I have things I need. But it would be nice to have someone go...hey this needs to be helped...how can we help her? Do we know someone that might have the skills to come step in? Or how about paying money back that I fronted for things you needed when you needed it.

I have fought hard this year to get mobility back. I have fought to get my photography going. I know I have quality work. I know I have an eye for it. I know I am skilled. But what do you do when you can't fix the things going wrong and not enough money to go around? I am working non stop and I can't make enough to do the things that I need to do.

I hear we are so proud of him. He is doing so good. He has changed so much. We want to do this for him.

Not many see everything I do in the sidelines. They see a messy house. They see an overgrown lawn. They see a broken shed. They don't know how much I have tried to do to get things sorted. Its assumed I do nothing all day. But who is the one fighting battles with drs, over my own health and my kids?

I know so many people that could have stepped in to do things. I know people that have use my stuff and damaged them and its...oh I am sorry. But sorry doesn't fix things.

My own household. I ask for simple things...We got distracted. Oh we forgot.

I guess I should just get distracted, forget, and you know what, if i did that...bills wouldn't be managed...food wouldn't be here. No one would get to appointments.

Here I stand given tons of promises...empty promises...and nothing to show for it.

Years of wasted time. Cups poured into and now I just want to be alone. I want to go into the woods or lake or somewhere away from everyone.

I want to be away long enough that when they notice...hey she's unavailable...will they start to question where I am? Am I good? Or will I still be the afterthought I currently am?

UNTIL THEY NEED MY HELP...

I'd love to win the lottery to fix the issues needed and then leave people to figure shit out.

I will be going through my stuff. Selling what I can. Tossing or donating what I cannot. I am going to fix my car and then try to get things done in a way I can go for a while. Be alone and just think until I can figure out how to handle the next mess.

If I am not important enough to be thought of when you do not need me, then I am not important enough to stay here.

Family shouldn't stand alone.

Where Has The Time Gone-Life Values We Live By.

My youngest is now 15. It is really hard to deal with knowing she is my last baby.

She has made me so proud. She is sweet. She loves to sing and is a whole vibe.

I love all my kids and watching them grow has been amazing.

It is a hard pill to swallow knowing that I am done having kids and they are all almost adults. My oldest is about to be 23, and next is 19, and then my youngest at 15.  I think about this a lot.

My kids have been through many things. My 2 oldest lost their dad in 2010. My husband is the only Dad they know and he has never treated them any different.  Our youngest doesn't look at her siblings as step siblings. They are her siblings. We don't differenciate based on who has a different Dad.

My children were raised to not treat people any certain way because of their color of skin, race, sexual preference, culture, religion or anything else that typically causes a rift in our human life.

They know people are people and should be treated fairly.  We all bleed the same. If someone treats others badly my family is quick to be like ok, this is not for us.

My kids were raised to understand that a persons behavior shouldn't be allowed to be made excuses for.

So here is some things my kids understand:

If you choose to drink, be safe, have a DD, and if you are not a good person drinking you need to stay alone. If you choose to be dumb and be abusive and mean, you need to stay away til you sober up and own up to whomever you treated badly.  If one cannot own up to that...we will stay away until you get your stuff together. Or we will only be around when you are sober. If we explain how it is affecting us and you do not respect that, then that is a you problem and it is something that needs to be thought over because it becomes a sad life when you push people away due to bad choices.  We will always be supportive of recovery, and proud but we will not enable choices that can make your life go even further downhill.

This same thought process applies to drugs. Only person that can get help is a person that wants help. People cannot make another person change. They have to be ready to want it more then whatever thier crutch in life is. It does not make someone a bad person, but I also do not buy that it is a disease.  A disease you cannot control what happens. Things that become an addition, starts off as a choice. I know that sounds harsh, but, its reality.

If someone lays a hand on my family, I give full permission to give it back to them. Protect yourself always and do not become a victim. If you see something, say something.  You can not help people that are afraid to do things. If I knew someone was being hurt, and was afraid to do something about it, and they reach out...I am like momma bear. Lets roll.

My kids know I accept them no matter what. They can talk to me about anything. They are free to make their own choices but they need to be respectful as well.

My family knows they can call me anytime and I will come as long as I have wheels to get there. If not I have connections to get them out of the situation.

They know we do not have millions of dollars. They appreciate the things we do have. It has been a hard pill to swallow for them to understand that this country is not stable for the regular joe.

My family is open to everyone that is honest and open with us. If someone needs help and we can, we do.

I think everyone should have a community, a tribe. People should have a safe space to be able to express themselves.  

Anyhow, I think back to how I grew up and I want to be for others what I didn't have from my own family.

POLL - I need feedback!

 Hi everyone!

I am in a bit of a dilemma. As most of you know I have been in professional photography for 23 years or more. I have been doing photography much longer then that in outside studio settings. I am debating upgrading my current equipment.

I have 3 photos that I will be posting here. 2 Of them are shot with the same device and the 3rd one is my old professional camera. I will not say what is what. I need unbiased feedback. 

Which one is better?

What makes it better to you?

There are no right or wrong answers...I literally need honest feedback.

Which one if you had it offered as a print would you want to purchase and why?

I need the best feedback you can offer and I accept it all good and bad!

Pic one

Pic 2

pic 3

I appreciate you all. Please share so more people can leave me feedback!

Find me here!!!

Published Again!

 Good Morning Friends!!!

I got the text message this morning that I again have been published!

That makes 3x this year.

The photo that I took was in Tulsa, OK, downtown near the Vangaurd.

This picture was so cool because I love the mural but this van was SUPER UNIQUE!

I had to take the photo and it came out beautiful.

I did not edit it at all.

This photo was taken with my S23 Cell Phone in Manual Raw mode.

Don't Sleep on your phones cameras if you know how to use manual settings. It is trial if you are not familiar with DSLR camera settings.

I have been in the professional photography industry since 2003.

Want to see the photo?

Ready....Set...Here goes!!!!

If you want to see more...

https://dot.cards/jtcreationz

To find me check out #jtcreationzphotography 

I am on Facebook as my main page and then several other pages added to the things that I offer aside from photography!

Thanks for visiting!

One-in-a-million Picture

Hey everyone!

I wanted to share this pic I took tonight!

It is stunning and literally a One-in-a-million pic. Raw and unedited night mode!

If you like what you see... Send me a follow!

My links are below

Https://dot.cards/jtcreationz

 

Do You Need Anything Custom Painted??? (Check this out!)

So I want to introduce you to the cleanest painter in the states. His name is David AKA Brobeanpaints.

I have been watching his content and work for like almost 2 years or better now. He has the absolute cleanest work I have ever seen. This man is a genius with painting cars, rims, guitars, anything really that needs a new paint job. He is a master of his craft. So if you have tiktok...you need to check his account out. Video after video of the glossiest paint jobs I have ever seen. I will be adding a few videos. Give him a follow. If you need work done and you will travel or you are nearby, please message him on tiktok. I will be adding additional contact information as soon as he sends it my way.

Located in Knoxville, TN.

BroBeanPaints on TikTok 

Tiktok Sample 1

Tiktok Sample 2

This is just a few jobs he's done. If you need custom work please hit him up.

This is just a small sample of the work he does.

Keep a watch on the hashtag #brobeanpaints 

It will be blowing up very soon.

The Peoples Artist Competition

 

The Peoples Artist Competition Starts on May 4th!!!

If you would like to vote for me and my artwork please check it out here

Tiffany Joly - JTCreationz

As you can see from my images, I do many kinds of art and I was very excited to be entered and accepted into this event. Please Check out my links and my pages. Maybe you will see something that strikes your fancy.

JTCreationz Digital Business Card