Thursday, October 31, 2013

Fear of Intimacy and the Tango Cure - Book review

Before I get started on this review I must tell you, I am still reeling from this book.  While it is not a very long book, it is filled with passion and heart that you don't often get and it transports you to the dance floor right along with the author as he expresses not just the "dos and don'ts" of Tango but also the pain that comes with such a dance and the respect and trust as well as rules that go along with it.

This book was far from boring.  I started reading and instantly wanted to keep going deeper into the book. It brings one to the shoulder of the author as he explains how he overcame being homophobic, learned to respect a woman, how to listen to your partner without her ever saying a word, how he learned the different styles of tango and his preferences and, how its not such a dance where you can just know a step but one in which you must be in sync with your partner to a point you can almost feel the thoughts of them during the dance.

How rejection can bring a man to his knees and the pain that he has that can be allieviated during a set of Tandas.  How it is possible for passion to overcome a tango dancer to a point in which it can be an embarrassment, but how he was able to overcome it by his imagination on something less likable.

He explains how a man becomes an effective leader and a lady a follower for Tango and how once a person gets experienced in the dance a subtle relaxation in stance is enough to show a huge difference in the partner.

How does this make me feel?

I never thought of dance in this manner. I have danced Jazz, Tap, and Ballet, Swing and yes I have done the Tango, but never on such a serious level that I thought much about the emotions behind it.  Tango to me always seemed an angry dance.  Like the dancers are stern and skilled at the same time, but after reading Fear of Intimacy and the Tango Cure, I see now that it really is therapy. A way to lose the anger, or sadness and lonliness, a way to meet new people and learn about them no thru speech, but thru touch, unspoken vibrations that come off the opposite sex in waves that can affect not just a single person but an entire group.  It is a way to seek acceptance in the form of learning without having to drop your baggage on another person but to use your passion for something you love to take you away across the dance floor.

This book brought my attention to Tango to an entirely new level of awareness. I am still reeling. The respect and modesty that is Perri Iezzoni in this dance is very captivating to read about.  I wish men understood what he does in regards to dance.

I have been to many places, mostly to sing but I enjoy dancing and one thing I can not stand is a strange man gawking at me or dancing up against me when I have no idea where he came from, or trying to press against me.  That is so often what is seen now a days on dance floors. In this respect, I wish more clubs would use the Tango rules of respect to how the dancers mingle. How they embrace, how they unspoken let the other know they wish to dance for just a little while, and all that time during the dance, feel the emotions, the passion, the anger or sadness that flow from the other person and know that this little reprieve is a way to reduce these unspoken problems and that the dancers have helped each other without ever exchanging phone numbers or anything. Completely serene, completely discreet and also relaxing.

I give this book a 5/5.
I HIGHLY recommend this book to read and share. It will literally give the reader a new respect for the art of Tango.

I am so very blessed to have been given a chance to review this book. It blew me away!

Thank you so much Perri!!!!

Please check this book out. You can purchase it on Goodreads HERE

You can read more about Perri Iezzoni Here

Disclaimer - I recieved a copy of this book for an 100% true and honest review.  The views expressed above are completely true and 100% my own opinions.

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